On the Inside

Well, eventually I had to leave the glamour of the red carpet to embrace the glamour of the Shrine Auditorium.

Except, it turns out that the Shrine isn't exactly glamourous. Maybe back in the day it might have been something to behold, but I think it's lost that allure since then. In fact, one might call it rather... dingy. But this is the last year they would be holding the Emmys here (they're building a fancy new venue for it), so it was still kind of cool to get to experience the event in its traditional home.

Anyway, when it comes to glamour in Hollywood, it's all about the “who,” not the “where.” So I walked in and tried not to be too conspicuous as I scanned the crowd for famous “whos.”

I found Joanna and Jana, who were enjoying a glass of champagne and they suggested the bar area might be a good place to hang out. I started to work my way through the masses when I suddenly realized that a quick trip to the ladies' room might be in order. So I changed direction and headed downstairs. But along the way, a yellow blur flew by me, announcing in a crisp British accent, "I'm so sorry... I really apologize... I just have to get to my seat..." It was Minnie Driver! (She did seem sincerely apologetic for cutting in line, but nobody seemed to mind.) The bathroom was pretty standard for a public venue, but there was one nice touch. I guess Olay is one of the sponsors of the event, because they had a little station set up with various toiletries and accessories (Q-tips, tissues, powder, etc) for anyone who needed them. I didn't take advantage of that, but I did help myself to one of the samples they had stocked the counters with that contained a little jar of Definity SPF 15 correcting protective lotion and intense hydrating cream.

After the Minnie Driver sighting, it occurred to me that my best shot of seeing stars—the female ones, at least—would be to simply hang out around the bathroom. I mean, you just know they were all going to have to go at least once during the evening, right? :) But I also realized that nobody's going to want to have their picture taken exiting the loo, and I did actually want to see some of the show, so I quickly gave up that idea and headed back upstairs.

I headed straight to one of the bar areas only to discover them closing it up! This was meant to encourage people to go to their seats, and they would re-open about half an hour into the show. So I decided to go ahead in myself.

I needed help finding my seat because I was wearing my contacts instead of my glasses, which meant I was completely incapable of reading the numbers on my ticket. The ushers pointed me in the right direction and I headed up to my seat, which of course was in the nosebleed section. I saw lots of people taking flash pictures of the stage area, which surprised me. Not because I figured they'd be caught at it; but because they really thought a flash would make a difference at that distance. Hello?! They only go about 50 feet, and we were about a quarter mile up!

I think it was the producer of the show who came out and explained the new theatre-in-the-round stage they were trying out this year. After watching a bit of the show, I don't think they'll be trying that again. The vast majority of people on stage went to only side of it, which meant that half the audience spent the evening watching people's backs. (Even though I was in the stratosphere, at least I was on the right side, so I could at least get a sense of who the people were down there.) After his explanation, a voice boomed over the announcement system: “Applause in the house, please. Applause in the house.” We dutifully complied and the audience burst into cheers.

Since the show, I've read a lot of reviews that dissed Ryan Seacrest as the host, but I thought he was fine. I mean, I don't think anyone will do as good a job as Ellen DeGeneres did, but I don't really have a lot of expectations for the hosts to begin with.

I also enjoyed the opening number with the characters from Family Guy, even though I don't watch the show myself.

We had been told earlier that the celebs all head back out to the lobby after presenting or winning something, but that the guards would make it difficult for us to go down there again. So I settled in for a little while to watch the show. I thought that a lot of the speeches were very touching, for example Jamie Pressly's and Katherine Heigl's (although I can't believe she actually won...).

You know that music that comes up when they go past their alloted time? Well, it is a LOT louder in person than it seems when hearing it on TV. You really couldn't hear them at all once it started up. It didn't bother me in most cases, but I really thought that they should have held out a little longer during Robert Duvall's acceptance speech. I mean, the guy is a true legend in this business, for goodness' sake. Show him a little respect!

I was thrilled to see Terry O'Quinn win for best supporting actor in a drama. Besides the fact that I just love him as Locke on Lost, I always think it's great when real working actors, who've been perfecting their craft for years without much recognition, finally get their due. So much better than when it goes to the flavour of the month.

During the commercial breaks they showed us clips of earlier Emmy shows on the Jumbotron. I can't remember now what they actually showed us, but I'm a big fan of TV nostalgia, so I did enjoy them.

I thought the duet between Tony Bennett and Christina Aguilera was terrific. I even managed to get a pic where you can almost recognize them!

My absolute favourite part of the show, though, was the announcement of the nominees for best writing staff on a comedy or variety show. I was dying laughing through that whole section, especially the one for The Daily Show, where they had clips of Alberto Gonzales saying “I can't recall” before each nominee's name. Priceless.

About an hour into the show, I decided it was time to take my chances with security and so I headed down the stairs, trying desperately to devise an effective strategy for making it past the blockade...

Next installment: Hobnobbing with the glitterati.